Summer Swelters on…

Wow, I’m a really bad blogkeeper! Been over a month now. Well you can’t expect much when school’s out, lol. I’ve learned a lot over the past few months. Allow me to share with you:

GARDENING:

Always, always, always, with no fail, label your plants. I thought I could remember what I had put in the ground. HA! I planted green beans, cream peas, and pintos. So, one day, after things were lookin’ about ready to pick, I thought it was time to pick me some peas. So, I waited till the pods looked a little dry and got my friend and his son to help us ‘shell some peas’. I did not realize my mistake until about 2 weeks later when my REAL peas matured. We had actually picked PINTOS and had the worst time trying to shell the little boogers because they weren’t ready yet! I thought those were funny looking peas! Now I know!

Keep out the chickens. In my rose-colored little pea brain, I imagined some kind of idyllic symbiotic relationship between my chickens and my garden. The chickens would remove all the pests while simultaneously fertilizing my garden with their nitrogen-rich poo. I had about 30 – 2mo. old chickens loose in my garden. At first, all was bliss. Then, over time, I noticed they were eating my cherry tomatoes. No big deal, I thought…I give most of ’em away anyway. THEN they started eating my big tomatoes. That definitely put a hitch in my giddy-up. Now, I work hard on my ‘maters and I’ll be danged if some stupid chicken is going to eat my meal (I still like chickens, mind you, I was just really upset with them. I really don’t think they’re stupid.) Then, I found that my squash had been slowly but cluckingly methodically picked on. THEN, they poo’ed all over my porch. But not just the porch. The chairs, my blankets, my tables, and to top it off, trampled my moonvine and my poor, poor Christmas cactus. Now I was really hot. OUT, OUT, OUT!!! I screamed as I snatched them up. Anyway, now they’re safe in their own coop, and no more poop for me to contend with!

God praise canned green beans! You would think they’d be easy to grow. Apparently, this year at least, not so. I know this because not only did my lovely, lush vines only produce 8 measley pods, but my mother harvested her bumper crop of 4 pods, and her friend reaped 3. God Bless the Jolly Green Giant.

: Hoss and Fran taking a nap

LIVESTOCK:

Goats: After several months of budgeting, I found that having 12 goats costs me approximately: $25 a month in hay, and $29.24 a month in feed. Not including their wormer, which, by the way, is quite pricey at $80 a bottle! Fortunately, though, it lasts a LONG time. We are planning on selling 8 goats, so I figure I can quarter my costs. $15 a month isn’t bad for having some brush trimming!

Poultry: It costs me about $43.75/mo. to feed my chickens, geese, ducks and turkeys. Now, the geese and ducks don’t do anything besides honk, quack, and crap, but I really do like my geese. The turkeys are endearing except for the fact that they lay on my plants and would eat a 50# sack of corn in one sitting if I let them. Plus, now they’re too big to butcher. Now what? The chickens are the most useful so far, as they are giving us copious quantities of lovely brown eggs. I think I will always have some chickens till the day I die! They also love to eat lots of grasshoppers and i haven’t seen hardly any around lately.

In General: While free livestock is appealing, the reality is that you have to feed ’em, house ’em and clean up after ’em. You really have to ask yourself if it’s all worth the cost and effort. As far as my geese go, they love to eat grass, which I think it hilarious and they honk when they see someone they don’t recognize, which I also think is hilarious. They are definitely more ‘pet’ to me than useful livestock. The ducks quack and crap. I hope that will change and eventually I’ll get my 100 eggs a year out of them. Maybe next spring. The goats are very useful for eating brush. You will be very amazed at how clean they leave a wooded plot behind. However, twelve is too many for me at the moment. The turkeys are very interesting, but gobble down food at a phenomenal rate. Granted, I do have a breed which is very large, so I am not sure how the ‘heritage’ breeds would do, but I can tell you that these guys totally chow down. Bottom line is that my chickens and goats are, so far, the most useful livestock that I own.

FARM LIFE:

For the past 3 months, we have been budgeting. I’m bringing this up because I feel budgeting is very important to everyone, and especially for farm folks so we can assess our profit to loss ratio. I have learned that I just can’t currently sustain as much livestock as I thought I could, and that’s ok. Actually, it’s a weight off of my shoulders to sell off some of my flock, not just financially, but also mentally! After a major talk with myself, I decided to whittle down to bare minimum, and really throw most of my efforts into my gardening. After all, so far, it seems to me that my garden has paid off more than any of my livestock (except, perhaps, my laying hens), and it is SOOOOO much less effort for me to ‘keep up’. Sure, it’s work, too, but I don’t have to worm my plants, or chase after them, or clean up plant poo. So, I’ll always have a garden. The other thing I like about vegetable/fruit gardening is that you can sell the produce, sell something you’ve created with the produce, like baked goods or canned goods, or even just sell seeds. Anyway, I think it’s a win/win situation all around.

So, with budgeting in mind, for a very, very small initial fee, I can have a great big, gorgeous garden for pennies on the dollar. So, plants are in, new livestock is out for now. And that’s the farm report for this time!

My favorite thing for the moment: Ever listen to talk radio? I didn’t either until a few months ago when my favorite oldies station morphed into a talk radio station. That’s when I discovered Dave Ramsey. After I had listened to his no-nonsense style for about a week or so, I bought his book, The Total Money Makeover. So, I am currently on Step #2, which is the Debt Snowball. I have never done a real budget before, and before this April, budgeting was very hard because of the way our business was set up. Now that we get ACTUAL, REAL PAYCHECKS (lol), I can budget. I did my first budget in May, and thought, my God, no wonder we’re always broke! I have faithfully stuck to my budget sheet (which I print out monthly from daveramsey.com) and I have never, ever had this much money left over at the end of the month. I even amazed myself! We have paid off about 6 of our debts already and are slaving away to pay off our next debt. I even have enough now, saved up, to pay for our house taxes for this year. I have NEVER had that happen! You can do it, too! I like Dave because it’s not some weird scam, and he seems to be very down-to-earth about things, and seems to have good ol’ common sense. One day, I’m going to call the Dave Ramsey show and scream, “WE’RE DEBT FREEEEEE!!!!” Just you wait and see!

Snakes Alive!

Wow, it’s really been a loooong time! Lots has been happening around the farm. Since I last wrote, I’ve been harvesting potatoes, tomatoes, and strawberries, and I have planted corn and okra. I still have several empty beds, but I just don’t know what to put in them! I’ll probably reserve them for my fall crops now. Planting for fall will begin next month, starting with fall tomatoes.

About 2 weeks ago, Jason and I came home from a dinner date and found a small ratsnake in the driveway. Naturally I had to jump out and investigate (I’m pretty sure I’m one of the elite few women in Texas who will do that….wearing flip flops, nonetheless) Anyway, I picked up its tail and shooed it on it’s way. So, about 2 nights later, I was walking in the chicken coop to close up the chickens for the night, and there was another scaly friend slipping into my henhouse! Not in my henhouse, I told it, and I actually caught this one (barehanded, wearing boots), and carried into the house, where Jason was relaxing on the floor. Poor Jason. He married the only woman in East Texas that would handle a snake and bring it indoors.

Anyway, so then about 2 nights later, I walked out to water the garden. We have a pair of Dwarf bunnies that reside in our chicken tractor and I heard them running frantically in their cage. When I looked over there, I saw a large ratsnake trying to strike them through the wire….can you only imagine how terrifying that could be? This snake was larger than the first two; about 4 or 4.5 feet long. Armed with nothing other than a flowerpot, I used it to squoosh his head up against the wire so that I could grab his head. So, I caught him, too, and put him in a little plastic cage so we could release him elsewhere. I had forgotten about a snake’s sheer will and strength to escape, and while I was out doing something else, he managed to pop the top open. Fortunately, he only made it to the corner of our shop and we caught him again, this time, we put a roll of heavy wire on the top of the cage.

Sooooooo, then the NEXT night (lol) we were in the shop, and I had the thought, “Wouldn’t it be funny if there was yet another ratsnake in that same corner”, and I looked up and there was the biggest one yet, calmly snoozing in the upper corner. Now, this snake was about 5 foot long, maybe a little more, with a girth of about 2 inches or so. Pretty big for a native snake. Jason got his head with a rake and I put on my gloves and caught him. He was NOT happy, either! You probably don’t know this, but ratsnakes, and many other snakes release a foul-smelling, musky liquid when they’re caught. It resembles a dead skunk….it’s just really lovely. Once you catch a snake, you kindof have to ‘clear house’ for a while so you don’t get nauseated from the smell!

So, I have really had my share of snakes for the past week! They do not bother me as long as they aren’t trying to eat my livestock, and then it’s war. I do catch and release, I don’t ever kill them, with the exception of maybe a water moccasin at our pond (haven’t seen one yet). Even then, I’d have to use a gun to do it, as there’s no way I’m getting close enough to a moccasin to kill it with a shovel! Same goes for rattlesnakes…I have not seen them, but I wouldn’t get anywhere near one, either. Moccasins tend to be a more aggressive snake, and rattlesnake’s poison is just plain scary. I am not really scared of either the copperhead (poisonous, but not aggressive) nor the coral snake (DEADLY poisonous, but rear-fanged and shy). And, as you can tell, as far as the non-poisonous snakes go, they just don’t scare me. Mind you, I am very, very careful with them, because I still do not care to get bitten, but I have been bitten before, and while it was scary, I got over it. (Obviously)

I would urge you not to kill snakes if at all possible as they do an excellent job of eating mice and rats. Of course, unfortunately, they will also eat birds, chickens, and rabbits, too! But they’re actually basically good creatures with a bad rap. I know I’m in the minority when it comes to liking snakes, especially being a woman who likes snakes. People always look at me in a really funny way when I tell them I do catch and release, and I’ve even had parts of the Bible thrown at me (Genesis 3:15 – ¹⁵You and this woman will hate each other; your descendants and hers will always be enemies. One of hers will strike you on the head, and you will strike him on the heel.”)

I think that’s very sad to take it in the literal sense, after all, snakes provide us with a great service, which is keeping down the rodent population. While trying not to question Satan’s choice of a serpent as his earthly form, I really wish he would have picked the cockroach. Now that I can understand.

Anyway, the next time you see a snake in the road, think of me and don’t swerve to hit it!

Don’t bend over in the garden, Granny. You know them taters got eyes…

Well, apparently May is the month o’ vegetable pests. The other day, I was looking at my tater plants when I noticed that a big chunk of leaves was missing. Upon closer observation, I also noticed some big, fat somethings feasting merrily on my tater vines. I ran into the house and discovered that they were the dreaded Colorado potato beetle. The larva look somewhat like grotesque ladybugs. The adults are actually a pretty striped beetle, about the size of a small June bug. Unfortunately, they also enjoy feasting on MY taters, so I picked them all off by hand over a 2 day period. So far, it has been about a week and a half and I have not seen any new ones.

Then, today, I saw that one of my tater vines was completely defoliated. Now I had just checked out everything yesterday and all was well. I bent down and found a HUGE tobacco hornworm munching away at my vines! I picked him off, let the kids have a look-see, and fed the big thing to our turkeys, who were more than happy to gobble it up. So, tonight, I’ll be on the hornworm hunt with a flashlight. It’s always something! I also think that a rabbit is munching on my roses. Sigh.

Well, the chicken coop is about 95% done, thank you dear, sweet Lord! Saturday, the chickens and our 20 pound turkeys were wallerin’ all in my beautiful herb garden and flattening everything. It kindof freaked me out, seeing all of that hard work being destroyed, so yesterday, Jason worked non-stop on the coop until the little building was predator-proofed. The most interesting thing about the coop is that it is made of virtually all recycled materials. I promise to post a pic soon, because it is so cool! Jason calls it Fort Cluck. Anyway…

I found a really cool website for you all to look at: http://www.maryjanesfarm.org/

I decided that’s who I wanna be when I grow up, lol. Read her bio…she is a very interesting lady. I am going to subscribe to the magazine, too.

Toodle-oo…I’m off to hunt hornworms!

The Good Earth

So, about 3 weeks ago now, we brought home TWELVE goats. Four does, and each had a set of twin boys, so that’s 4 mommies and 8 babies! For the most part, you can sum up the breed as a mixture of African Pygmy, Nigerian Dwarf, and Mini-Nubian. What that all means is that they are small, some are better for meat (Pygmy) and some are better for milk (Nigerians/Nubians). Anyway, they have been a real joy to behold! I can’t get past the way they look somehow like tiny deer, and the way that they NEVER stop eating fresh leaves and grasses. They have done quite a number on the brush around the house; all the while fertilizing it with their ever present ‘goat poo’ or ‘nanny berries’, if you want to get cute with it!

Goats are considered browsers, which means that they prefer to take nibbles of EVERYTHING (plantwise) and keep on walking. Unlike horses and cattle, they would much rather be munching on some sweet gum leaves rather than grass. They do, however, enjoy munching off the tops of tall grasses. I can tell you that if you ever want to naturally defoliate some of your property without using chemicals, GET SOME GOATS. On the other plus side, you can milk them (which we do plan to do later), or eat them, if you so wish! We don’t plan to eat them, but I will not tell you that I would never eat them. After all, meat is meat, right? ;0) Anyway, for now we are just happy for them to do the arduous task of clearing the land.

Yesterday, I went to one of my favorite places (Goodwill), and after buying a mountain of awesome clothes for a song, I also picked up the classic book “The Good Earth” by Pearl S. Buck. Ever read it? I could not put it down and read it cover to cover in about half a day or less. It is the story of the Chinese farmer Wang Lung and his wife, O-lan. The time period is pre-Revolutionary China, and Wang Lung and his family must endure the hardships that all farmers must endure eventually; loss of crops, drought, flooding, and in this case, severe famine. So severe that it was rumored that some of the villagers ate their own children to survive. But this book is not all about hardships; Wang Lung also enjoys times of prosperity and good fortune. He is an honest man who is one with his land. Because of his hard-working nature and unwavering love and adoration for his land, it provides for his family and eventually Wang Lung becomes quite rich.

It’s a funny thing that 200 people can read one book and come away from that one book and have 200 different meanings that we take away from that book. For myself, I took away many things from this book. I feel that, first and foremost, the further that we get away from our own Good Earth, the worse off we eventually become. In this book, if you were not rich by inheritance, you either worked your land or you would starve. Those who were fortunate (?) enough not to have to work for their food found themselves with too much idle time. And you know what is said of idle hands! (“Idle hands are the Devil’s tools”) So it is in The Good Earth, where those idle hands always manage to find trouble, whether it is with opium or prostitutes or just plain laziness. If you are working hard, you do not have time to worry with such things! You are too busy planting, watering, or reaping your harvest.

I try to relate this story to today, where we can get all that we could ever want with the push of a button, literally. I’m not saying that we do not have to work (although there are so many who do not, and still rely on we hard workers to take care of them(!) ) but, for example, I thought about how easy it is just to drive up to a fast food place, pay my cash and get food in return. Wang Lung had to work for every single grain of rice that he or his family ever consumed. He didn’t have a Taco Bell or McDonald’s or God forbid, a WalMart. When his crop didn’t survive, they starved. They ate sticks and grass and leaves and even the earth itself. I can get up at any time and grab something to eat out of my pantry, and the thought of having to serve my kids dirt water somehow makes my own food taste as bitter as vinegar. It’s a very humbling feeling, knowing that there are still people to this day who die waiting for a meal. So, in that way, this book opened my mind.

Wang Lung cherished his piece of earth. He nurtured it, fertilized it, planted it, watered it, harvested it, and in turn, it provided for his family. It reminded me of MY earth. MY Good Earth. This piece of earth on where I sit today, writing to you. Where we have tilled our soil and planted our plants and we raise our livestock and where I eventually want my ashes to be scattered. When I throw my hands into the soil and pull from it a harvest for my family, I have nothing but a sense of pride and accomplishment. I do love and nuture my land, and in exchange it nutures me; not just from eating food that I harvest here, but it nutures me physically, mentally, and spiritually. I don’t wish to be anywhere else but here.

I think that if we all loved our Good Earth as Wang Lung loved his, this world would be a much, much better place.

Saturday Night Redneckerie

So last week, we were sitting in the living room after dark, all the doors were open to let in the (then) cool breezes, and I kept hearing these clanging noises. I went and looked outside and didn’t see anything. The next morning, I discovered a mad trail of greasy raccoon footprints all over our deck…apparently a coon had gotten into a pot of grease that Jason had fried something in that he had left on the back porch.

So, the next night. Jason sets out the 12 gauge (??!!??) for the coon in the kitchen. I’m sound asleep. At 4:24am, I wake up to hear Jason saying, “Is that just wind or rain?”. I mumble something, and he jumps out of bed, crying, “It’s rain, it’s rain! I have tools in the back of my truck that CANNOT get wet!” As he is running into the kitchen, I’m trying to find my glasses and the floor, and he comes running back into our room, whispering loudly, “It’s the coon! I’m gonna make some noise.” So I tell him NO, don’t shoot the coon, because it’ll be back and we’re in a Godawful rush as it is.

We get the truck moved into the shed after a 5 minute, 3 car frantic game of Musical Cars, and we manage to get everything put away. Then, our youngest comes into our room, so I go and fall asleep with her. About 30 minutes later, Jason comes up the stairs (now 5:30am) and whispers loudly, “The coon’s back! Do you wanna see it?” “NO”, I say,”I just wanna sleep.” The next morning, he makes a huge circle with his arms. “That coon was THIS big!”, he says. So, I name the coon “Cartman”, after the little Butterball, Eric Cartman, on South Park. Cartman had managed to completely rip the plastic door off of the dog food container and throw it to the ground, as well as eat about 1/4 of our dog food. The NEXT night. Saturday night…..

We now have a .22. No more 12 gauge cannons for Cartman. We set up the gun, a little dog food on the deck, and we wait. As expected, here comes a coon, but not Cartman. No, now we have yet ANOTHER coon to contend with. I fling open the back door, and POP POP POP POP, 4 shots……………………………………………uh, no hits. Coon #2 runs off to the safety of the UNDERSIDE OF OUR HOUSE. Sigh. Now we know there are at least 2 coons living right underneath us. Great.

We set up again. We leave all of the lights off and I decide to crack our kitchen window, overlooking the deck, and stick the barrel of the gun out the window. I get a snack and I am munching away, when suddenly something dawns on me: It’s a Saturday night, I have a Moon Pie in my hand, and I’m shooting wildlife from the comfort of my own kitchen.

Yes, we have officially arrived to Redneckia.

raccoons

Home is Where the Quiet Is/Chicken Tractors

So the other day, we left the farm to go work on our old house (my Mamaw’s house) in town. We just had it re-painted and it looks wonderful, but we had to do the yard, since it was littered with painter’s trash and the beds looked really unkempt.

After about 10 minutes of working, I became annoyed at the honking horns, squealing tires, and thumping music. I looked at Jason and said, “Can we go home yet?”. I guess he thought I was kidding because he just chuckled. So I pouted a little bit and worked for about an hour or so more. Cars zoomed by, people were honking, and I grew increasingly irritated.

Living in the country has that effect on you when you come into town. People have the tendency to annoy the living daylights out of you, no matter how small the annoyance may actually be.

I asked Jason again if we could go home yet, and he shook his head no. Like a 2 year old, I stuck out my bottom lip, folded my arms, and sulked. Finally, FINALLY, we were done, and I couldn’t WAIT to get back to my farm. As soon as we turned in the drive, I felt a feeling of peace and tranquility wash over me. I don’t need to be on medication for stress…I just need to go home! Every morning when I wake up and look outside, it’s like a dream that has come true. Even the sky seems more blue here, and that’s the truth. People don’t need drugs to stay sane, they just need some space. That’s my theory, anyway.

OK, part two of this blog. Apparently a lot of people get directed to my blog by looking up “chicken tractor”. Lol. Well, here’s ours:

Jason built the whole thing out of recycled wood, wheels, and hinges. It’s small, but would work well for 2-3 adult hens if you don’t free range, OR you can use it as a portable coop for lots of chickens. Right now, it holds about 20 small chickens at night.

Back to the farm

Well as April 15th once again approaches, you can see how politically motivated I can get! (read post below) Anyway, I do have a farm to run, so I’ll try not to hop up on the political soapbox too much, since this is supposed to be about our homesteading experiences!

So back to farm life….the other day, my friend, Suzie, came and picked up her 10 Buff Orpington chicks that I’ve been brooding for her as well as our other Ameraucana rooster. Boy, the coop sure does look empty! Even though we still have 12 Silkies, an Ameraucana rooster, and 10 Ameraucana chicks, 2 turkeys, and 6 ducks! I am so ready to get some eggs out of this deal!

The other day, we took our two oldest ducks, which are both Snowy Mallard males, down to the pond for the first time. You would expect them to wildly zip into the pond and never come back. Yeah, right! We had to literally push them into the water, and even then they would only get where they could touch bottom. They did feed for a while in the mud, but after about 10 minutes, they jumped out and started walking up the hill, looking over their duck shoulders as if to say, “Are you coming?”. So we all had to walk up the hill together (they wouldn’t have it any other way, since they like to follow us) and I put them back in the pen. So much for the call of the wild!

In gardening news, the weather has been fairly fabulous lately, with few exceptions. We have been having temps in the 70s with plenty of rain. Part of our broccoli has been harvested as well as our lettuce. The cabbages aren’t too far behind, either. I am really excited about our potatoes, as I haven’t ever grown them before. We’ll see how that goes! In disappointing news, some of our onions are bolting; meaning, they are now sending up a flower head, which means that the bulb growing is done. Grrr! So I just went and pulled those up, and set them out to dry.

Oh, lastly, we placed an order with Angel Food Ministries earlier this month and picked up the order this past weekend. Now, y’all, I’m really serious here. If you really want to save some $ on your groceries and you don’t want the hassle of coupons, place an order with this program! I was very impressed with the food quality. Plus, all of the food is from USA or Canada (hurrah!). At least it was this past month. We ordered a ‘basic’ box and the fruit and veggie box. It cost us $52 dollars and let me tell you that it was so worth every penny! Last night I made a fruit salad with the cantaloupe and it was excellent. I ate a tangelo last night and I assure you that it was the best tangelo I have ever eaten! Perfectly ripe and so juicy you couldn’t hold it without a napkin. The cantaloupe was also excellent; it was fully ripened and very sweet. We also have eaten some of the apples, and though they are small compared to what we’re all used to getting at WalMart (ugh), they were very sweet, had great flavor, and super juicy.

In theory, one ‘basic’ box will feed a family of 4 for a week. For the month of April, I have already placed my order, and I ordered 2 basic boxes, 2 of the ‘heat and eat’ meal boxes, and one fruit and veggie box. This cost me about 150 bucks. Naturally, if you need dairy products, it will add to your monthly food bill, as well as bread if you don’t make your own, but still, it keeps you from buying all that crap you don’t need and it is good, restaurant-quality stuff. You do have to pick it up at whatever host church is in your area ((it comes in on a Saturday, and you MUST go get it that day), but I’d rather do that than go to WalMart or the grocery!

Yeah, I’m going there…

I really try not to bring up politics or religion in any conversation…I know those are taboo subjects, but I’m going to have to say something today.

This afternoon, I had the pleasure of visiting a local business, C. Miller Drilling. I found out during lunch via the Operations Manager, that Mr. Miller had become somewhat of a media sensation last year when he wrote a disgruntled letter to then-elect Barack Obama. Anyway, I was given a copy of the letter and read it on my way home. Some of you may have already received this letter via email, but here it is in its 4 page entirety:

http://www.cmillerdrilling.com/files/cory_the_well_driller.pdf

As I read it aloud to my husband while he was driving, I was not only impressed by the articulate and succinct wording of this letter, but I literally felt my heart fill with American “Can-Do” attitude and pride. I also felt simultaneously angered, because, I too share Mr. Miller’s views on many levels.

Being the wife/office manager of a small business owner, I can feel Mr. Miller’s emotions in every sentence that he wrote. If you think that owning a small business is easy, you’ve obviously never owned a business before! I get to witness firsthand, everyday, the hard work, dedication, and sheer pain that it sometimes takes to keep a business afloat. My husband has kept his business going for 13 years…I can only imagine how intensely difficult it was to begin. I do know, for a fact, that the local bank refused to give him a loan, because, as they told him, “If we needed that kind of business around here, we’d already have one here.” I do know, for a fact, that he sometimes worked around the clock, all through the night, to turn out enough jobs so he would make enough money to pay vendors that month. I also know that he has had 13 years of extreme physical and mental anguish that go along with running a business. I also happen to know how sickening it is that we pay several 10’s of thousands in taxes yearly, to find out that our tax dollars are possibly, and probably going to built a high-speed train from Disneyland to Las Vegas (to the tune of 80 BILLION DOLLARS, I couldn’t make that up), or something just as equally ludicrous.

What I’m getting at is this: If you aren’t pissed off about what’s going on with our government, you need to open your eyes. I used to be one of those people, in my 20s, who had never voted and didn’t really care who was in Congress or President or whatever. Because at the time, I naively believed that those people ‘up there’ didn’t make a difference in my life. That what they did didn’t directly affect me. Well, times they are a-changin’. NOW, I know that I am directly affected by whatever happens in D.C. And I hope that you know that, too. It’s so easy to sit back and put on your blinders and try not to pay attention to what is really going on in this world. I know, because I did that for so long. But please realize that changes that are made in the laws and government and whatnot will affect you, and definitely not always for the better.

I do not pledge my allegiance to any one political party. I will vote for the better man/woman, or, in some cases, the lesser of two evils. I’m not an Obama-basher, even though I didn’t vote for him. I did give him a chance, which I think he totally has blown.

I’m sorry if you’re rolling your eyes because I am on my political soapbox, but I really believe that as a nation, we’re in trouble. I’m sorry if you think I’m a conservative nutjob, but the reality for us is that as small business owners, we are being eyeballed by the government, who are trying to tax the hell out of us. If you don’t agree, maybe you should swing by and take a peek at what I have to pay in taxes a year.

So, Mr. Cory Miller of C. Miller Drilling, hats off to you. Your letter reflects my feelings perfectly; I only wish that my tired old brain could have said it as well as you managed to.

And it all comes back around again…

Yesterday, I attended a free seminar hosted by our county extension office, the title being “Growing Your own Groceries”. We had a good time talking with various people, discussing chickens, goats, goat cheese, gardening, and the like. Our own chicken tractor was on display for all to see! It was fun. I am going to go ahead and add in here; if you have never tasted goat cheese, it is DEE-LI-CIOUS! I know that everybody has this negative image of a dirty ol’, smelly goat with smelly milk or something, but let me say this…have you ever driven by a dairy cow pasture in high summer? That smell is enough to make you gag, but we drink that stuff like there’s no tomorrow. Anyway, they had some of the goats there and I swear, they’re about the cutest animals you’ll ever see.

Oh, but the cheese! It was made that morning and it was a soft, crumbly texture. It is called Queso Blanco, which of course, means white cheese. It is very, very creamy and doesn’t really have much of a flavor, but is quite similar to cottage cheese/cream cheese mix. MMMmmmmm. Yes, one day, I will have some dairy goats! And when I do, I am going to make my best friend, JJ, taste some of the cheese without telling him beforehand what it is, because I know that he is ready to vomit after reading this, lol. This is the same person who can’t eat anything but white boneless chicken because seeing the bones makes him nauseated! haha. I can’t wait (evil grin). Also, they were selling goat’s milk soap and let me be the first to tell you it is AWESOME!!! I used it last night and this morning, and it is very, very mild and lathers better than any soap you’ve ever tried, I guarantee you that. They make a lot of different fragranced and also non-fragranced soaps. We got the Coco Bolo (to die for), Tuscan Garden (also to die for, just a touch more masculine than Coco Bolo), Lavendar, Tea Tree, and Gardener’s hand Soap, which has Starbucks coffee grounds in it! It makes for a good exfoliant/cleanser. Please do yourself a favor and buy some soap from these guys:

http://www.coolcreekfarm.com/products.aspx

Check out the goat’s names while you’re there; it’s hilarious. Also, they go to events like Tomato Fest, just check the website. Oh and lastly you can cut the bars in half…they are quite large bars, and cutting it in half makes a ‘normal’ sized bar. In quarters, it would be a good size for your kitchen sink soap dish. Anyway…moving on..

So, anyway, one of the Extension agents, Renee was telling someone how the people who lived through the Great Depression had it all right, and we ignored them, but now it’s all coming back around. They were right, we are wrong, and we’re going to have to go back to the way that things used to be. I couldn’t agree more. I was a child of the 80s…we were so spoiled compared to past generations! Remember the song, “Material Girl’, by Madonna? Didn’t that say it all about the 80s? I think we were all raised to be materialistic, if not by our parents, then by all the commercials and crap that the media shoved down our throats. It’s just as bad or worse today! I HATE watching some of the kid’s channels because every 5 seconds they are trying to push some crappy Chinese made toy on our kids. My 3 year old can sing the jingle to Peek-a-Boo Barbie, for crying out loud!

Anyway, back to my point: it is time to simplify our lives. It is time to learn that we don’t have to run out and buy everything new. My new favorite phrase is the oldie but goodie, “Use it up, wear it out. Make do, or do without.” I’m not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you that I don’t ever go buy crap I don’t need. I know that I shouldn’t, but old habits die hard. But, what I have been trying to do it use what I have, and if I don’t have it, get it secondhand. My SIL just gave us a couch and a kitchen table for no cost! They may need a little work, but they didn’t cost us a dime. I have even considered stopping and picking up furniture on the side of the road that people toss out. Don’t think this Junkyard Gypsy won’t either! I have dug things out of dumpsters; I have stopped and asked people for furniture that they have sitting by their trash can. I have scoured alleys and taken various things that people have thrown out. And I’m not ashamed to admit it! I don’t know why we have this stigma about using other people’s ‘trash’. You would be amazed at the things people toss out, I assure you! But let me get back to the Depression folks…

When I bought my Mamaw’s house in 2004, we had to do a through cleaning of all the cabinets. At the time, I laughed my way through the 9,000 butter and cottage cheese containers, 4,000+ yards of fabric, 500 rolls of old wrapping paper, years of rubber bands scavenged from newspapers, and saved bits of tin foil. I shook my head in amazement at the 25 bottles of dishwashing soap, 50-odd still-packaged dishtowels, and bottles upon bottles of various cleaners. Then, it was funny to me. Now, it’s not so funny…it was just plain damn smart! At that time, I thought, good Lord, Mamaw should have joined “Butter Tub Savers Anonymous”. Now, who could it be, that has about 60 plastic bottles and milk jugs saved out in her shop? And who is it who stocks up on dish soap, toothbrushes, shampoo, and toothpaste when it is next to nothing/free at CVS??? If I hadn’t had my head up my rear at the time, I would have been saving things all along. Because, after all, who knows when you’ll need some of those things that we are all so used to tossing in the trash? I use coffee cans for feed scoops, and cut off milk jugs for mini-greenhouses and to protect my plants from frost, and old half and half containers to start my plants in. I don’t have to buy a Jiffy greenhouse kit, or pots, or feed scoops. I hope that all of you will walk away from this and really, really think to yourselves about re-using what you already have, and stocking up on things when they are little to nothing at the store. Times are getting lean, and we all need to take away some notes from our grandparents! And for crying out loud, we don’t have to try and ‘keep up with the Joneses’!

Busy month, spring is so close!

Well, I apologize for taking sooooooooo long to touch up on this thing! My computer has been in detox/repair a couple of times and so I have really gotten behind! Plus, it’s planting season and baby chick season and I have been so terribly busy. We got in 10 Ameraucana pullets (that’s females in chicken speak) and 10 Buff Orpington pullets. The Buff Orps aren’t mine, but I’m holding them for my friend, Suzie. One of them is a real B, if you know what I mean. If you put your hand in the enclosure, which I have to do at least 2 times a day, she will try and take a beak-sized plug out of your hand! I usually call her a little buff B, and threaten her with the stewpot. Lol.

I bought 2 Broad breasted Bronze turkeys day before yesterday. I wasn’t sure what breed they were, but from process of elimination on the dealer’s website, i figured it out. That is disappointing to me because they have been bred to have so much breast meat that they are incapable of reproducing naturally. Yes, that means artifical insemination. Yes, that means they’ll probably be destined for the dinner table cause there’s no way I’m going to be a middleman in any kind of turkey sex!

You all should research about Broad Breasted White turkeys (that is what you will get @ the grocery). These are totally freaks of nature. Not the real Nature, but human nature. What I’m saying is that these birds were bred, inbred, etc, ad infininum, to make these turkeys that have freakishly large breast muscle, to keep us, the American public, happy. They can’t even breed because they are so heavy in the breast, that the males can’t perform their, uh, duties. Now, Broad Breasted Bronzes are the same thing, just in their natural coloration. I am really, truly interesting in ‘heritage’ turkeys; read: natural, heirloom breeds. These turkeys can breed normally and some raise their own young. Other turkeys must be hatched in incubators because the broodiness has been bred right out of them. So, in other words, my little baby turkeys may literally be our Thanksgiving dinner. Kindof weird to say, but I don’t really need BB’s as pets. Anyway, so I’m getting off of the soap box now, but what I was going to get into was how different turkey chicks (poults) are, as compared to chickens.

You may hear that a turkey is stupid, it will drown in the rain, blah blah. I really hate to use the word “stupid” when referring to animals because I think, “Well, ‘stupid’ when compared to what?” I mean, I’m sorry, but I know a great many people who could be outsmarted by a carrot. Anyway, after doing research, I learned that poults are a little……..slow. They move slow, their wings sort of droop, and they are slow to learn what and where the food and water is. However, I love them. When I stick my hand in, they come running to peck at my ring. Slowly, of course. I did read to put something shiny in the water and food so that they learn to peck at it. I grabbed a couple of beer caps for the water and a Mardi Gras bead necklace and ran it into the food dish. It just so happens that my shiny objects are alcohol-related…don’t let it fool you; I very rarely drink and I got the necklaces for a song at a garage sale. I didn’t have to flash anyone for them!

Anyway, these little poults are so endearing to me. Sorry to say they may end up in the freezer, but if it isn’t them, it would be some random, saline-injected turkey that lived a miserable life in some God-forsaken turkey ranch.

I also got my 4 Cayuga ducks in, and we have 2 Snowy Mallards. Now, ducks are a whole different ballpark. The negative is that they are SO MESSY. Just un-Godly messy. Now, that is when they’re in their enclosure indoors, I mean. I have never seen a creature consume that much water and splash it that much. It is like trying to raise a baby whale on land or something. They manage, within a few short hours to totally drench all of the bedding and their brooding box. I mean flooded, and totally stinky. If you don’t like to clean, don’t get a baby duck. On the other hand, when they are in their outdoor enclosure, that is no problem. Plus, they run after you at super-duck speed (at least 65 MPH) and manage to try and trip you with every step. They love to eat bugs here and there and mine also eat a great deal of sand for some reason. Anyway, I love my ducks!

Garden-wise, I have gone ahead and planted all of my herbs. I hope that we don’t get a frost, but if so, I’ll have to cover some of them. Tomorrow I am going to go ahead and plant my tomatoes, peppers and the like. This is a very exciting time of year for a gardener in Zone 8. March 15 is our typical last frost date. However, you all know that Texas weather is anything but typical. I’m going to take my chances, though. Back to the herb garden…I made a little mini-fence out of American beautyberry limbs, honeysuckle vines, rattan vines, and grapevines that I harvested out of our woods. Let me confide in you here for a moment. I do say curse words. Fairly frequently, actually, but never in the presence of children or company, or people that I don’t want to think badly of me (of course, my BFs don’t care, but anyway). Well, my dears, let me tell you that ‘gathering vines’ is work. Saying, “I gathered vines today.” sounds like something that comes out of Martha Stewart’s mouth, and certainly not mine. Saying, “I gathered vines” is like being stranded in a boat on the Pacific for 3 months with no water, no food, while being sun-bleached and having to eat seagull poop, and telling everyone upon your rescue that, “I took a little seafaring excursion for the last several weeks.” Ok, maybe it’s not that bad, but let me tell you, I figured out what kind of vines Tarzan swung around on. That would be called the rattan vine. I don’t know if that’s the proper name, but it’s a green, smooth vine that has the tendency to twist around a tree, cutting into it, and eventually weakening it to the point of death. How befitting! This same vine is the one that I scraped my arms, bruised my calves, and worked up a gallon of sweat trying to rip it out of trees. I decided that if I ever made a grapevine wreath, it would go for about $435,000. My God, I don’t know if there are anything tougher than vines. Naturally, as I was pulling with all of my weight, one of them came loose, and I flew backwards and bruised both of my calves on a log. And then that vine broke in half, so that added insult to injury. Anyway, I was down in the bottom for about an hour and a half, swinging, quite literally, from these titanium vines. But, I did manage to get a pretty good amount of them to use in my fence. It’s pretty cool, and I’ll have to post pics soon. Oh, and back to my cursing….throughout my vine ordeal, let me tell you that the woodland creatures really must have gotten an earfull that day. It’s a good thing that Bambi doesn’t know English. His father would wash out his mouth and send him to bed with no supper. It’s also a good thing that my woods are not close, at all, to anyone’s home. Also, may I add that no children were at home that day to hear my tawdry use of language.

Well, my fingers are tired, but I hope to get some pics and post more tomorrow.