Closed Casket, Open Buffet

One day, Jason said out of nowhere, “If I’m ever terminal, do you know what I want to do?”

I turned my head to look at him and wondered what it could be. A cross-country trip? Visiting ancient ruins? Throwing a huge party? Whatever it was, I was sure his last moments on earth would be spent with the ones he cherished the most.

“I want to travel across America and eat at every buffet I can find.”

Enter: The sad trombone sound. Enter: Crashing cymbals. Enter: My stare of shock that only a wife of many years can give.

As he was daydreaming of weeks of never-ending buffets, I was thinking how our familial unit had just been usurped by chicken fried steaks, mashed taters, and cream gravy. I knew the man loved his food, but I didn’t realize exactly how much until that moment.

And that, friends, brings me to this post.

Part One: I Take Thee, Buffet Plate, To Have and To Hold…

There is this place. A very magical place that sits at the intersection of Highway 84 and Interstate 45 in a little town called Fairfield, Texas. It is home to a restaurant called Sam’s Original Restaurant & BBQ. It also houses the longest buffet bar that I’ve ever seen in my life. The impressive length of the buffet, however, pales in comparison to the quality and sheer amount of the food that is contained within its copious collections of steam trays and canisters. On any given day, you have the choice of at least six main entrees, and this isn’t including the sides (at least five) or the immense salad and soup bar. There is also a heated table just for the cobblers and a chiller just for the pie slices.

We discovered Sam’s by complete accident a few years ago when we met a woman in Fairfield who adopted a foster kitten we had. By the time we made it to I-45, we were all very hangry and I desperately searched Google for a restaurant. Sam’s came up on top and it was listed as a “buffet restaurant”. Now although I grew up in the time of restaurant buffet dominance (think: 1980s-1990s Golden Corral, Jason’s Deli salad bar, Ryan’s, Pizza Hut, Chinese buffets, and the like), I also was around when buffets fell from grace. And boy, some of them fell really hard, and for good reasons. So I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a slight sneer on my face when I found Sam’s. Still…thousands of four and five star reviews? The hanger won. To Sam’s we went.

The interior of the restaurant is a little bit Cracker Barrel (there is a cute gift area up front) and an old school buffet. The floors are carpeted, the tables and chairs are wooden. It has a very vintage feel about it. I’m pretty sure that the steam table for the cobblers has hit its 30th birthday. All that aside, it was extremely clean. Waitstaff buzzed around like bees on a warm day. We were seated and within five minutes, we had our drinks and a loaf of homemade bread with butter. I don’t remember what we had that visit, but I do remember what happened later that day.

I need to tell you that Fairfield is a little less than an hour and a half away from our house, so it’s not like a short hop, jump, and skip down the road. After we had gotten home that afternoon and took our daughter to her grandparent’s house, we had a few hours to ourselves. The day wore on and upon the cusp of evening, we found ourselves hungry again.

I said, “You know what sounds really good right now?”

Jason looked at me and he knew just what I was going to say.

“SAM’S!” we both shouted in unison.

Yes. We were the weirdos that drove to the same restaurant, an hour and a half away, twice in a single day. Thank God by then the lunchtime waitstaff had gone home, so we wouldn’t be recognized.

Part Two: To Love and To Cherish

Visiting Sam’s became was now a semi-sacred thing. It was too far to visit with any great frequency (my pants appreciate that fact very much). The inconvenience made it become a *Very Special Place* that we only went to on *Very Special Occasions*. Just like the other day after we went on a three hour hike. Nothing to celebrate a day-long, healthy and fitness packed adventure like ending up in a place guaranteed to put you in a caloric coma.

Yes, we made the trip yet again and all of us were silently dreaming of what we’d be stacking on our plates. This time, I got pictures!

After you roll yourself away from the food, there’s another room with gifts and a lot of “this n’ thats”. Socks! Stickers! Retro toys! Pajamas! There’s something for everyone. My particular favorite was the shiitake socks:

And last of all, should you need to recharge your EV Porsche, Sam’s can help with that, too!

On the way home, we mostly rode in silence due to the fact that we had completely overstuffed ourselves and had to keep our mouths shut to hold everything in. Somewhere about ten miles from home, Jason suddenly spoke up.

“I was just thinking about that huge pan of mashed potatoes.”

Crickets from the rest of the car’s passengers.

“And then that huge pan of gravy to go with it! I mean…I would take a boat and drive around that pan of gravy. And what if you made a canoe out of a potato wedge? I’d row around it all day. Better yet, I’ll make skis out of french fries and when they got soggy, you could just eat them.”

I just said, “I think you might need therapy.”

Part Three: ‘Til Death do us Part

After our semi-annual pilgrimage some days later, I heard about a man who, as a part of his funeral arrangements, had requested that his visitation be held at a local diner. I thought it was pretty funny so I told Jason about it and his eyes lit up.

“That’s what I’m gonna do! I’m going to set aside money so everyone can go eat at Sam’s in my memory!”

I stared at him in silence. He went on.

“But make sure everyone gets an extra helping of mashed potatoes and gravy for me, and make sure you get a picture.” He sighed and looked into the distance.

“You know, I love that place more than anything.”

My eyes were now semi-bulging from their sockets when he turned and looked at me.

“Besides you, of course!”

Well thank heavens for that.