Chef Dad

As you all may know, if you are a regular reader of my blog, we look forward to the cooler temperatures because we are able to cook in our fireplace with our Dutch oven.  Jason called this afternoon to tell me he was preparing a pot of fireplace chili, so I was really excited.  After I got home, Jason carefully tended his precious Dutch oven with nothing but great love and care.  He gently stirred the contents of the pot, all while adjusting the pot oh-so-precisely.  As he stood up, he said, “My chili may need a little spice adjustment.”  At that very moment, I remembered that I had used up the last of the chili powder about 4 days ago. 

I said, “Uh, we don’t have chili powder.  What did you use?”  J: “Well, I found some powder in a jar.” Me: “Um, it didn’t happen to be a glass jar did it?”  J: “Well……”

I thought, uh oh.  We went into the kitchen and he showed me the glass jar, which was now missing half of its contents.  “This one” he said.  I stuck my finger in the spice jar and licked my finger, knowing full well what was coming. 

Bleeeeech!  That’s cayenne pepper!  Oh my God, how much did you use?” 

“Well, like half the bottle.” 

I burst out into laughter.  “I guess it’s a chicken nugget night, huh?” I said.  So, due to the  culinary faux pas, we instead ate a plate full of chicken nuggets, which I am almost convinced are not really meat at all. 

After dinner, curiosity got the best of us.  Jason tasted the ‘chili’ first. 

“Oh………………….GOD!” he managed to say between wheezes.  ” This is DEADLY.”

I took my place in front of the pot.  “My Lord!  And how many jalapenos did you put in?”  “Well, just a few.”  A few?  There were about 2 whole super hot jalapenos in there!  I put a drop on my tongue. 

“GAAAAAAAAKKKK!”  I managed to get out while spitting the ‘chili’ in the trash.  It was so hot, it seared my tongue and throat and made my eyes water. 

If I remember correctly, this is also the same man that accidentally substituted salt for sugar in a cookie recipe.  Then again, maybe I just have my memories mixed up.  Anyway, just so that you all know, Jason actually happens to be a good cook most of the time (with the exception being Chinese food, and when he gets ‘inventive’ with his spices.  For whatever reason, he tends to over-garlic things sometimes). 

He makes the best brisket this side of the Mississippi, and that’s the truth.  Just don’t try the chili on a night when he’s using an unlabeled spice jar!